[asterisk-biz] [REALLY REALLY OT]

[Steve Totaro]

Dovid Bender wrote:
> Hi guys,
> The stress was getting to me last night and I figured I would create 
> this. Kinda took my mind outa the moment and gave me a laugh. If 
> anyone has any comments and or suggestions please email me off list. I 
> think we can all use some of these once in a while when the work load 
> gets to us. After I have a nice list of different scenarios I will 
> post them on my site.
> Exten => working_hard,1,Set(feeling=stressed)
> Exten => working_hard,2,Feels(${feeling})
> exten => working_hard,3,Goto(pissed_off,1)
> exten => pissed_off,1,Get(${FAVORITE_BOOZE})
> exten => pissed_off,2,Drink(${FAVORITE_BOOZE})
> exten => pissed_off,3,DrinkSomeMore(${FAVORITE_BOOZE})
> exten => pissed_off,4,goto(feeling_happy,1)
> exten => feeling_happy,1,Worktill(${FAVORITE_BOOZE} wears off)
> exten => feeling_happy,2,WorkSomeMore
> exten => feeling_happy,3,goto(working_hard,1)
> PS I know my coding isn't exact. I don't need corrections on it ;)
First step is admitting you have a problem. ;-)

Answer YES or NO to the following questions.

1 - Have you ever decided to stop drinking for a week or so, but only 
lasted for a couple of days?
Most of us in A.A. made all kinds of promises to ourselves and to our 
families. We could not keep them. Then we came to A.A. A.A. said: "Just 
try not to drink today." (If you do not drink today, you cannot get 
drunk today.)

Yes No
2 - Do you wish people would mind their own business about your 
drinking-- stop telling you what to do?
In A.A. we do not tell anyone to do anything. We just talk about our own 
drinking, the trouble we got into, and how we stopped. We will be glad 
to help you, if you want us to.

Yes No
3 - Have you ever switched from one kind of drink to another in the hope 
that this would keep you from getting drunk?
We tried all kinds of ways. We made our drinks weak. Or just drank beer. 
Or we did not drink cocktails. Or only drank on weekends. You name it, 
we tried it. But if we drank anything with alcohol in it, we usually got 
drunk eventually.

Yes No
4 - Have you had to have an eye-opener upon awakening during the past year?
Do you need a drink to get started, or to stop shaking? This is a pretty 
sure sign that you are not drinking "socially."

Yes No
5 - Do you envy people who can drink without getting into trouble?
At one time or another, most of us have wondered why we were not like 
most people, who really can take it or leave it.

Yes No
6 - Have you had problems connected with drinking during the past year?
Be honest! Doctors say that if you have a problem with alcohol and keep 
on drinking, it will get worse -- never better. Eventually, you will 
die, or end up in an institution for the rest of your life. The only 
hope is to stop drinking.

Yes No
7 - Has your drinking caused trouble at home?
Before we came into A.A., most of us said that it was the people or 
problems at home that made us drink. We could not see that our drinking 
just made everything worse. It never solved problems anywhere or anytime.

Yes No
8 - Do you ever try to get "extra" drinks at a party because you do not 
get enough?
Most of us used to have a "few" before we started out if we thought it 
was going to be that kind of party. And if drinks were not served fast 
enough, we would go some place else to get more.

Yes No
9 - Do you tell yourself you can stop drinking any time you want to, 
even though you keep getting drunk when you don't mean to?
Many of us kidded ourselves into thinking that we drank because we 
wanted to. After we came into A.A., we found out that once we started to 
drink, we couldn't stop.

Yes No
10 - Have you missed days of work or school because of drinking?
Many of us admit now that we "called in sick" lots of times when the 
truth was that we were hung-over or on a drunk.

Yes No
11 - Do you have "blackouts"?
A "blackout" is when we have been drinking hours or days which we cannot 
remember. When we came to A.A., we found out that this is a pretty sure 
sign of alcoholic drinking.

Yes No
12 - Have you ever felt that your life would be better if you did not drink?
Many of us started to drink because drinking made life seem better, at 
least for a while. By the time we got into A.A., we felt trapped. We 
were drinking to live and living to drink. We were sick and tired of 
being sick and tired.

Yes No

Did you answer YES four or more times? If so, you are probably in 
trouble with alcohol. Why do we say this? Because thousands of people in 
A.A. have said so for many years. They found out the truth about 
themselves — the hard way.

But again, only you can decide whether you think A.A. is for you. Try to 
keep an open mind on the subject. If the answer is YES, we will be glad 
to show you how we stopped drinking ourselves. Just call.

A.A. does not promise to solve your life's problems. But we can show you 
how we are learning to live without drinking "one day at a time." We 
stay away from that "first drink." If there is no first one, there 
cannot be a tenth one. And when we got rid of alcohol, we found that 
life became much more manageable.